i hate not being able to keep to certain resolutions/ground rules i’ve set.
i hate it that i have incongruent affect. gar! y like that???
i hate being mean to people for reasons that they do not/are not aware of. can i stop feeling the emnity?
i hate having to control my actions and emotions all day long.
i hate myself for being lazy.
i hate it when people make grammatical errors in msn nicks/blogs. and i go close to crazy if it were me who made the mistake. (it IS ‘if it were’ rite? and ‘me’? not was and i??? —> stress!)
i hate my lack of interest/drive/motivation towards practising clinical examination for paeds.
i hate paeds. i hate the system, the administration, the concept. i hate the drudgery of school life now. i can’t wait for the posting to end.
i hate myself for being manipulative.
i hate myself for not practising what i preach.
i hate myself for my unrealistic daydreams.
i hate it that i cannot remember what i’ve read/studied.
i hate the feeling of liking someone who doesn’t know/doesn’t care/doesn’t wish to acknowledge it.
i hate liking someone i think i shouldn’t like. apparently the heart does not listen to the brain. damn.
i hate the feeling of disliking people.
i hate feeling angry/upset/lost/alone.
i hate hate.
& i hate myself for hating so many things.
and to sum it up,
i hate not being in control!
blogging doesn’t seem to let out all the pent up emotions.
i just want to lie in bed and blank out.
